Clarification is Sometimes Necessary

So my husband pointed out that I needed to clarify that I sometimes refer to myself as a "bad feminist" in the Michael Jackson/80s sense - I'm so good, I'm bad :)

It's no secret that I really struggle with society's expectations - women should do this, women should do that - but I also have to remember that my feminism roots are what give me the freedom to choose my own path.

I shall now go listen to some MJ...

Feminism in Comic Form

When exactly did feminism become a bad word? Was it Rush Limbaugh and his 'femi-nazi' characterization of intelligent women? Or did the younger generation shy away from second wave feminism? (Ironically, this same generation was able to make this choice due to the activism of earlier feminists).  I've always proudly called myself a feminist and have never seen it as a pejorative term, but know many (educated, successful, intelligent) women who would never self-identify as feminists.

I found this comic on the blog Fudge This Sugar, which has great images but even better discussions.  I can't tell you how many times I've had this exact conversation with people. Be sure to read the comments for a fascinating discussion about gender identity.

Yep, You're a Feminist

What do you think? Do you consider yourself a feminist? Why or why not?

The End is Near (and no, I don't mean the stupid Rapture)

(Although there's no chance that I'd be raptured anyway. Plus all the remotely interesting people would be left behind.)

No, I mean the end of my paid employment at the Humane Society.  It's been amazing and frustrating and heartbreaking and joyful all at the same time.  I've never had such an emotional connection to a job before, which meant that I took all of those emotions home with me.  I would get home and be unable to function some nights due to exhaustion, not to mention the nights that I came home with starvation cases or bottle-feeding puppies.  Other nights, I'd be just giddy with excitement after a day of adoptions.  But the vast majority of nights I came home to an empty house. 

David travels every week and I worked every weekend (Wednesday - Sunday). We'd easily go weeks - sometimes a month or more - without spending a day together.  We might get a Friday or Saturday night, but he leaves on Sundays and I have grad school during the week at night.  I don't know about you, but I need more time with my partner than that. We put up with the schedule for almost a year, but it finally became too much.  I love my job and I love working, but I love my husband more.

My last day is Friday, June 3rd.  When I wake up on Monday morning, I have nothing to do.  That's going to be tough - how do I fill my days? How do I maintain a sense of purpose? (And don't say laundry).  I have a ton of volunteer options.  I think it's going to be a matter of setting a schedule for myself...or I'll get sucked into the Bravo tv marathon vortex.



How much time do you spend with your significant other? Do you wish you had more time, or more quality time?

Women in the Special Forces

Anna Holmes, a regular (and bad-ass) contributor to feminist blog Jezebel, wrote an amazing op-ed in the Washington Post today.  She argues that women should be allowed to participate in the Special Forces, despite the historical ban on women in combat.  Our society celebrates female action heroes, so long as they're hyper-sexualized (see: Lara Croft), yet we maintain a certain level of squeamishness when it comes to women fighting in reality.  Holmes points out that women are not asking for special treatment, but simply the opportunity to train and  to be part of these elite groups.  There is no call for some sort of affirmative action, just equal opportunity.

Here's the article - a fantastic example of feminism at work.

Joining the Ranks

A Funny for your Friday

This has absolutely nothing to do with feminism, but it haz a dog. Try to keep from laughing out loud...

Hyperbole and a Half: Wild Animal (The Simple Dog Goes for a Joy Ride)

I Quit My Job Today.

So...I submitted my resignation today. I'm officially a 'stay-at-home-wife', which is a title that I never thought I'd have. Am I excited about my decision? Yes and no. It's bittersweet - I've always worked, and we assume identities according to our work here in the U.S. But I left to be with my husband, which is more important than a job.

Would I feel this way if I hadn't been divorced earlier? Would I feel this way if I made the larger paycheck?

I don't know. Right now, I feel as if I have abandoned my feminist roots - but feminism is about making an independent choice, which is what I'm doing. That doesn't make it any easier.

This blog is about examining choices - about parenthood, careers, feminism, and marriage. About the difficult challenges facing women today, and about the difficult judgment facing every one of those choices.

Join me in the discussion.